Less then a month away from celebrating her 28th wedding anniversary with Barack Obama, Michelle Obama knows a thing or two about finding a partner and maintaining a good relationship.
But in a recent episode of The Michelle Obama Podcast, the 56-year-old quipped that ‘you can’t Tinder your way into a longterm relationship.’
Her comment was met with fervid disagreement on Twitter, where users who met their own partners on the dating app showed off their long-lasting relationships, with several bragging about finding their husband and wives on Tinder years ago.
Expertise: Michelle Obama spoke about marriage in a new episode of her podcast
Going strong! She and former President Barack Obama are about to celebrate their 28th wedding anniversary
Swipe right! When talking about how to build something that lasts, the 56-year-old said: ‘You can’t Tinder your way into a longterm relationship’
Michelle focused on the subject of marriage in last week’s episode, in which she chatted with comedian Conan O’Brien.
Conan also had several years of marriage under his belt, having tied the knot with Liza Powel O’Brien in 2002.
The former First Lady discussed finding a match, saying that people need to give themselves time to see the person they are dating in lots of different situations before committing.
‘There’s no magic way to make that happen except getting the basics of finding somebody, being honest about wanting to be with them, to date them seriously, to plan on making a commitment, to date them, seeing where it goes, and then making it happen,’ she said.
‘You can’t Tinder your way into a longterm relationship,’ she added.
The former First Lady seems to have meant that people can’t expect to meet The One if they’re just pursuing hookups and treating dates as disposable, always looking to swipe on a new person.
Context: She said finding a partner is about ‘getting the basics of finding somebody,’ dating them ‘seriously,’ and ‘making a commitment’
Knows something: Conan also had several years of marriage under his belt, having tied the knot with Liza Powel O’Brien in 2002
But social media users zeroed in on the quote, interpreting it to mean that Mrs. Obama was dismissing dating apps like Tinder altogether.
When People.com tweeted the quote on September 6, dozens of Twitter users who found love — and even marriage — on the app replied with their romantic stories.
‘I met my mans on tinder and we just had our one year,’ a woman named Diamond replied. ‘Michelle [i love you] but w/all due respect but you got wifed up long before tinder existed.’
‘Actually, @MichelleObama, you stand corrected,’ wrote a woman named Amanda McGary. ‘My husband and I met through Tinder over 6 years ago and have been happily married for 4 years.’
One woman said she’s been with her Tinder match for two years, while a man tweeted that three couples in his family met on the app.
Beg to differ! Responding to the Tinder quote, Twitter users chimed in to disagree with Michelle
‘My husband and I beg to differ… 5 years this month,’ tweeted a young woman named Peyton.
‘I love you Michelle, but I met my sole [sic] mate on Tinder. & It’s our 1 year anniversary on the 23rd,’ wrote a man named Ben.
Many have shared romantic pictures with their boyfriends and girlfriends.
‘We swiped on one another THREE years ago and we thriving babe,’ said one such poster.
‘Overall if you find someone serious, whether in-person or online, they will find you too,’ said a woman named Melanie who met her man ‘on Le tinder 2.5 year ago.’
‘I love [email protected], but I actually met my husband on @Tinder 6 years ago, and just had our 4 yr wedding anniversary a few days ago,’ wrote a woman named Shidume Lozada, sharing a wedding photo.
Worked for them! Many have shared romantic pictures with their boyfriends, girlfriends, and even spouses
A woman named Megan knew her guy was ‘The One’ a month in, and they’ve now been married for three years, while another couple just celebrated a fourth wedding anniversary.
Chasten Buttigieg, who met his husband Pete Buttigieg on the dating app Hinge, quipped: ‘At least she didn’t say @hinge.’
A few commenters came to Michelle’s defense, clarifying her comments.
‘I think what she means, angry people in comments, is that Tinder is USUALLY used as a hookup app and you’re not going to find a serious partner by just f***ing around. OBVIOUSLY there are exceptions to that,’ wrote one.
‘I read it as her using Tinder as a stand-in for online dating culture, where people just quickly move on to the next person at the 1st sign of frustration with a SO (because inevitably your SO will frustrate you). It’s not a criticism of finding love on Tinder,’ said another.
Making it work! Several people who met on the app shared how long they’ve been with their partners
They did it, too! Pete Buttigieg’s husband, Chasten Buttigieg, added his two cents. The couple met on Hinge
Michelle also spoke about her own marriage in the podcast episode.
‘There were times that I wanted to push Barack out of the window,’ she admitted. ‘And I say that because it’s like, you’ve got to know the feelings will be intense. But that doesn’t mean you quit. And these periods can last a long time. They can last years.’
‘Young couples, they face these challenges and they’re ready to give up because they think they’re broken,’ she went on.
‘And I just want to say, look, if that breaks a marriage, then Barack and I have been broken off and on, throughout our marriage, but we have a very strong marriage.
‘And if I had given up on it, if I had walked away from it, in those tough times, then I would’ve missed all the beauty that was there as well.’
She also compared picking a romantic partner to picking a basketball team.
‘We’d have better marriages. If you’re looking at a team, the people you want to win with, then number one, you want everybody on your team to be strong, right?’ she said.
‘You don’t want any weak links, you don’t want somebody that you can dominate.
‘Also, if you’re on a team, you’ve got to be able to do everything — especially in basketball, it’s like, you would never pick somebody that says, “I only dribble. I don’t shoot, I don’t defend, I just dribble.”