A polyamorous couple who are ‘spiritually married’ reveal they encourage each other to have relationships with both sexes because monogomy is ‘too constrictive’.
Darrien Leathers, 23, and Ryan Meyers, 27, who tied the knot just two months after meeting in a ‘spiritual’ ceremony in the Sequoia National Forest, call their relationship ‘sexually fluid’.
The couple from San Diego, California, are so open with each other, Ryan invited Darrien’s other girlfriend Beth Sanchez, 20, to a surprise birthday party he threw.
Ryan said: ‘A monogamous relationship can sometimes feel like I’m taking my love and shining it like a flashlight on one person.
Darrien Leathers, 23, and Ryan Meyers, 27, who tied the knot just two months after meeting in a ‘spiritual’ ceremony in the Sequoia National Forest, call their relationship ‘sexually fluid’
‘In a sexually fluid relationship, your love is like a sun and it radiates in all directions.’
Ryan, a music producer, and Darrien, a meditation guide, met on MeetMindful, a dating app for mindful people, in September 2018.
Darrien admitted that at first she was looking for a girlfriend, but Ryan’s profile was the first she saw.
She said: ‘I joined the app because I wanted to meet people who were into the conscious lifestyle and aware of what they ate, how they felt and the choices they were making.
Ryan, a music producer, and Darrien, a meditation guide, met on MeetMindful, a dating app for mindful people, in September 2018 – and Darrien now dates another woman, Beth (right)
‘The app makes you date mindfully. You are only given 10 matches a day so it’s not about going through really fast, swipe, swipe, swipe.
‘I originally downloaded the app to talk to girls, but before I changed my preferences, Ryan’s face popped up. We met shortly after. We fell in love right away.
‘On our first night together, I told him that I had just got out of a relationship with a couple and that I didn’t want to limit myself to a relationship with just one person.
‘Love is limitless and we don’t have to put a lock on love. He told me that he was also fluid and he had an attraction to both sexes.
Darrien began dating Beth, a student and hairstylist, in July, after meeting her on Tinder 18 months before. Beth also has a boyfriend
‘We decided to be in an open relationship and that we were going to see each other and other people too.’
After just two weeks together, Darrien moved in with Ryan and the pair decided to get ‘spiritually married’.
Ryan said: ‘We decided on a spiritual marriage instead of a legal marriage because we didn’t want the government to define our love. You can’t define love with paper or words.’
In October 2018, the pair travelled to the Sequoia National Forest in California for their spiritual wedding ceremony.
Ryan said: ‘We rented a beautiful Airbnb and we were under the redwoods. It was the most flawless trip I’ve ever experienced.
Darrien admitted that at first she was looking for a girlfriend, but Ryan’s profile was the first she saw
‘It felt like we were in a fantasy world and that we had created a vortex of love in the forest.
‘We had a little ceremony and we set some pine cones and crystals around us on a blanket.
‘We had this really special moment between the two of us where we expressed our love and commitment to each other and how much we wanted to grow together throughout our entire lives.’
The pair now go by Darrien and Ryan Seqqoa in honor of their ceremony in the national forest.
The pair now go by Darrien and Ryan Seqqoa in honor of their ceremony in the national forest
In July, Darrien began dating Beth, a student and hairstylist, whom she had met on Tinder 18 months before.
Beth has a boyfriend and is also in an open relationship.
Darrien said: ‘She and I had a friendship online. We messaged each other on Instagram.
‘When we met in July, it felt like we had known each other for a long time. It’s been really cool to be able to nurture this feminine bond.’
Ryan initially had some doubts about Darrien’s relationship with Beth, admitting he was ‘a little hesitant’.
Ryan initially had some doubts about Darrien’s relationship with Beth, admitting he was ‘a little hesitant’ – but the threesome now get on
‘She was a relationship from the past and we were growing and releasing old patterns and creating new realities for ourselves, not just following our physical desires,’ he explained.
‘But once I met Beth I knew it was a genuine thing.’
Ryan has met Beth four times and even invited her to Darrien’s surprise birthday party on July 30.
‘We planned a surprise birthday party for Darrien and I invited her to that,’ he said.
‘It’s been a really cool experience. I know that Darrien and Beth stay in touch. It’s all love and I can feel the love and it’s great to just get more and more love.
‘I can feel jealous but I have to remember that it’s a free and open love. We want to allow each other to be the best version of ourselves.’
Ryan has met Beth four times and even invited her to Darrien’s surprise birthday party on July 30
Although Ryan says ‘doesn’t have time’ to date other people right now, he believes that in the future he will have his own girlfriend or boyfriend or become a ‘throuple’ with the right people.
Ryan said: ‘I don’t have the time right now to be doing extra dating outside of the relationship.
‘I’m just going with the flow and whatever is meant to be, will be. It’s not something I’m pushing or forcing at all.’
Beth added: ‘I get to enjoy the best of both worlds. I get to have someone who is so very different from my significant other. They are night and day.
Beth says she gets to enjoy the best of both worlds with her arrangement with Darrien and her boyfriend
‘Darrien has such a positive energy and a spiritual side whereas my significant other is very business-oriented and logistical.
‘There are two parts of me that feel completed. It’s possible to love more than one person.
‘Love is something that can be spread rather than just contained to one person.’
Ryan and Darrien share their experiences as a sexually fluid couple on their Youtube channel, Growing With The Seqqoas.